Archive for June, 2011

One for My Besties

Friendship is
Deep and complicated
Born out of long hours
Time on the ground

Creating a space safe
For vulnerability
For being ourselves
In these faces

I see hours of investment
Theirs and mine
Hours of listening and hearing
Hours of trying to understand

Some are more precious
Because of their constancy
Their loyalty
How they can be counted on

When a friend walks away
There is nothing
You can do to stop her
Because friendship has to be

And Honest
And Real
To be friendship at all

And these four?
They stick it out
They love me well
They make my life richer

And sweeter
And fuller
They remind me of the things
I’ve forgotten

They have lived the moments
Of my life with me
And shared their own as well
They make the time

They know my story
They help me remember
Who I want to be
And love me when I fail

They are my bosom friends
My besties
My support system
My shoulders to cry on

They are constant
And steady
In words and silence
Always there


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141. New bookcases full of books
142. Menu planning for visitors
143. Good beer in the right glass

144. Bringing brothers to a minor league game in the good seats

145. And the museum

146. And to the battleship, aquarium and beach
147. And the go-carts

148. And miniature golf, along with random stocks

149. Free tickets home and back – thanks to Meghan (we LUV SWA)

150. Challah!

151. Old pictures

152. Very generous friends with fabulous ideas for a night on the town

153. Crazy good food

154. Dessert in the middle of dinner

155. Followed by more seriously good food

156. And ridiculous real dessert (with ice cream we picked)

157. Sisters visiting

158. Long walks and laughter
159. Playing on the same team – even when we lose
160. Changing the sheets for the next round of company (Y-A-Y, Kara!)

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131. Kid playlists: Puff the Magic Dragon, Horton Hears a Who, You’ve Got a Friend in Me
132. Chocolate milk
133. Squirrels’ foiled attempts to reach the birdseed
134. Fresh, homemade strawberry ice cream
135. Family road trips
136. Clownfish in the aquarium
137. A husband who can tie down an oversized IKEA load
138. Farmer’s market – peaches and berries and corn and golden tomatoes
139. Help with building all the many many bookcases
140. Honey Apple Butter

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111. Family gametime

112. Perfect burgers on the new grill
113. Wedding pictures from Erin‘s website to look at over and over again
114. Boots on little boy feet
115. Remembering chords on the guitar

116. Baseball games on cooling spring evenings
117. Baseball players who give little boys baseballs

118. Airplane rides going home in both directions
119. Graduates in long rows

120. Proud big sisters

121. Weekend full of little brother hugs
122. Tex Mex all weekend long
123. Ten year old Jakey still willing to sit right beside me
124. My seat in church next to the big boys
125. Megan Smale in charge of cake

126. Parties full of old friends celebrating together
127. Exit rows with lots of legroom
128. Opening wedding presents

129. First tomatoes harvested

130. Anticipating a long welcome home hug

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I remember this picture first
Whenever I think about Baby Benny
Surrounded by Cheerios
In his little blue overalls

And I remember his big brown eyes
That so distressed him for a time
As one little brother after another arrived
With eyes as blue as Deborah’s

He grew up so very fast
(It feels so parental to say so)
But one day he was playing little league
And the next he was coaching Jakey’s baseball team
And now he is all grown up
Or at least he thinks he is
And he is very very funny
And very very smart

And I am looking forward to his future
As he figures out who he wants to be
As he makes grown-up choices with grown-up consequences
He is ready for the challenge

He graduates high school today
And he has skills he has not even begun to realize –
Skills that come from being one of thirteen
From being a Blinn
He is not just a good kid, he is a great one
And I am so proud of who he already is
Independent and ready to take on the world
But still my brown-eyed baby brother

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Seventeen years ago today
I got in my little black Honda
And followed my parents Suburban
Speeding along toward Duncanville
Anticipating the arrival of these two

And then they were there
(I will spare them the details)
Both healthy and happy and whole
With twenty tiny fingers and twenty tiny toes
And I could hold both of them at the same time
And they grew so very fast
Smiling and sitting up
And making all sorts of noise
But they still fit, one on each hip
As their little personalities began to show

Zacky Lou, always into something
Impossible to deter, no matter the punishment
ZB, always eager for a snuggle
Stopped from mischief with the slightest frown
Both of them impossibly adorable

It is so easy to picture them like this
Zeke’s sweet ringlet curls
Zak’s expression always a little roguish
So different, but always together
And how they grew!

They are seventeen today, one year from being adults
Alike in some ways: both excellent musicians
Both with their own brand of Blinn humor
Both incredibly smart and good looking
Too big to hold on a hip anymore

But never too big to remind them
That I saw them born
And changed their diapers
That I held them in my arms
And that gives me the right
To big sister hugs, forever

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